" Any patch of sunlight in a wood will show you something about the sun which you could never get from reading books on astronomy. These pure and spontaneous pleasures are 'patches of godlight' in the woods of our experience."

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Escape

I hid myself
Built a wall around my heart
I ran, thinking my problems would just go away.
I let the gate slam shut,
Pulled up the drawbridge,
Determined to keep You out.
I needed to escape,
That was my excuse
Time to myself
Time to be free
But instead I bound myself up in larger chains
Confined myself to the darkest dungeon.

But You never left
You were always there
Watching and waiting
Arms open wide
You knew I would return.

I grew weary of my race
Tired of seeking escape
My chains became heavier
As did my heart.

Everywhere I turned,
I saw You.
In the strangest places-
A book, a poem
A movie, a song
You presented Yourself to me.

And each time
My wall began to crack
The locks on my chains began to rust
I felt my heart beat in response to Your love.
Then I realized my mistake
You are my escape
In You I can be free
No more running,
Except straight into Your arms.




Wednesday, February 4, 2015

The Power of Self Worth

Women vs. Women. It's something that has been a plague on our society for a long time. It seems with the influx of social media, it has become an even bigger issue. I've been sitting on this blog post for a while, and I think now is a good time to publish it. If you are a woman reading this, please think about the way you act/react to women around you. Women have been the underdog of society for a long time and it's important that we support each other and not tear each other down.

 
Inadequate
Jealous
Lonely
Intimidated
Ugly

For a long time, I applied those words to myself.

I thought I was the lesser person...or the worthless person.

I wasn't as good as you.

Not as pretty.
Not as talented.

I was invisible...

But now I realize that you are the one all those words describe.

You were making me feel this way because you feel these things about yourself.
And the only way for you to feel better
Was for me to feel equally as bad or worse.

But not anymore...

No longer will I be invisible
worthless
ugly
untalented
or inadequate.

You have lost your power over me.

And I feel sorry for you.

You'll never know the power I feel now.
The power of self-worth.

Maybe someday you will realize your mistake.
Maybe you'll realize that you aren't any of those things either.

Neither of us is perfect.
Stop pretending you are.
Know that you are
Worth it
Smart
Pretty
Talented.
and a million other amazing things.

Focus on being your best self.



Thursday, January 29, 2015

Walk by Faith

"Step out of the boat"
He beckons to me.
"Step out on faith
Come follow me!"

But the storm is surging,
The waves crashing
He is obscured
By a wall of rain.

It is too dark
And I am afraid,
I will be swallowed up
By the waves

Yet He still calls.
I see His figure
Walking on the water
"Have faith in me!"

So I step out -
For a moment,
I rest in His gaze
I see him clearly
Through the haze

How swiftly a moment passes!
Peace is torn from my grasp!
I notice the wind and waves
Lightning crashes overhead.

I begin to sink...
 But I don't turn back.
I keep facing Him
I may be crushed in the depths,


But I saw Him
Felt the peace of
His loving gaze
It was worth it.

Then He is there
Grasping my hand
Pulling me upwards
Into His arms

"Be still now
I am here."
As He holds me close
I realize -
My faith has made me whole.




Saturday, December 20, 2014

Christmas Is Different This Year

Home
Family
Gifts
Light
Laughter
Trees
Same as always
Baby
Manger
Star
Shepherds
Angels

But this year is different
The ice in my heart 
Has cracked away
Lights are brighter
Trees prettier

The cold outside
Won't freeze me
Hope and love
Keep me warm

Baby in a manger
Means so much more
God's gift to us
A tiny baby
His only Son
Born to die
 So that I might live

That's why Christmas is different this year
Realizing the importance
Of God's gift
The reason for the season
It means so much more
When you accept
God's gift.


Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Christmas Lights

Glowing Christmas lights
Shine down upon me
Warmth, love, and comfort
Fill my heart

Christmas lights make me happy
They cheer me.
Twinkling like stars -
Brilliant, multicolored stars

Memories flood 
Of Christmases long past
Reflecting of old times
Warms my heart

The lights remind me
Of someone who came
A small baby born,
The reason we celebrate this day

That baby was a light
For all the world to see
He came here to save me
 And He came to save you

I love Christmas lights
And the joy that they give.
I love that small baby
And the light that He gives.

 


Friday, December 5, 2014

Bad Guy gone Good

Am I the only person who loves a bad guy gone good story?

Present me with a tortured bad guy with a twisted past and then show me his redemption. I will melt into a puddle of tears and feelings. He will forever be one of my favorite characters.

Why is this redemption story, cliche as it is, so important? Why does it impact me in such a huge way? Why am I always rooting for the bad guy who becomes a hero?

Maybe he's an evil vampire who has been rejected all his life, then when he finally finds acceptance with the woman he loves, it changes him.

Or perhaps he's a druggie, who only wants to die, but finds a reason to live and comes out of the gutter as a new man.

What about a genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist who literally becomes a hero and learns to love and care for more than just himself.

Or my favorite: a madman who stole a blue box, ran away from his problems, committed genocide and then committed himself to helping save others.

It doesn't matter. The story has been told hundreds of different ways. Why is it important?

Because if there can be redemption for them, if there is goodness somewhere inside of those people, then there is redemption for me. Maybe I see that dual layer within myself. A person who has done horrible things but learns and grows from it to become a better person. Isn't that the human condition? Isn't that what most people strive for?

And usually the "bad guy" slips up and falls back into his old ways at some point in the story. That always hits me hard. I grieve for them. Why would you do that again?? I think.  But then I see myself in that too, always repeating my mistakes. But that still doesn't take away from the redemption. Because the character sees the mistake and is sorry it happened. They pick themselves up and try again to be the hero.

It is more realistic to see characters who are bad and yet also good. That is how most human beings are. Everyone isn't all bad or all good. We are a mixture of mistakes and apologies. Bad choices and good choices. So it feels more real to me even if the story is about vampires, superheros, or time lords. I can connect with that character because I see myself in them.

Redemption makes a great story and great characters but more importantly it gives people a desire and a hope for something better for themselves - that they too can find redemption and have a better life.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

A Heart that Loves the Ocean

I watch the waves,
Waiting and wistful
Wishing the water
Would wash me away.

The wind pushes me
The waves pull me
Presenting me with possibilities
Its power calls to me
The chaos scares me
Yet I am comforted

Crashing waves are music
To my ears
The spray of the ocean 
Invigorates me

Will I miss the sun?
The salty air?
The smell of the sea?
Will they be lost to me?
When I sink,
Pressed under the crushing waves,
The curve of the ocean
Embracing me.

Precious water
Crystal clear
Carving a new heart in me -
A heart that loves 
The crest of the waves,
Splashing foam.
A heart that loves the ocean.